What’s it like to be you? 
That was the question Bob Goff — author, speaker, and humanitarian known for his storytelling and his call to live out an active, courageous faith — challenged us to start asking instead of the routine, “How are you?” He opened the National Christian School Association Conference with a message that was both simple and deeply convincing. Sitting among Christian educators and leaders this week, I found that simple shift profoundly meaningful. “How are you?” is polite. It’s safe. It allows for “I’m good” and a quick exit. “What’s it like to be you?” invites something deeper. It requires presence. It slows us down and opens the door to someone’s real story.
Bob shared about a neighbor who was battling cancer. In her final days, he asked if there was anything else he could do for her. She had one request: she was a lifelong Boston Red Sox fan, and she asked him to wear her Red Sox hat for the rest of his life. Bob is not a baseball fan. He lives in California. And yet, he now wears that blue hat with the bold red “B” every single day.
When I took a photo with him at the conference, I remember noticing the hat. It felt oddly out of place. But once I heard the story, the hat wasn’t odd anymore. It bore someone’s story. And it made me think: we never really know what someone is carrying. We see the exterior. The smile. The leadership title. The confident presentation. The polished social media post. But beneath the surface may be grief. Fear. Fatigue. A diagnosis. A prayer that has not yet been answered. Sometimes we do not see those realities because we never ask the right questions. And sometimes we do not ask because we are afraid of what the answer might require of us.
Meeting people in their suffering is not convenient. It costs time. It costs emotional energy. It may even cost comfort. But Scripture makes something clear: suffering is not wasted.
“Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.” — Romans 5:3–4 (NIV)
Paul does not dismiss suffering. He explains its purpose.
Suffering produces perseverance — the steady endurance to remain faithful. Perseverance forms character — shaping who we are becoming. And character produces hope — a confident trust that God is at work.
This is not abstract theology. It is the way God refines His people. He uses hardship to build endurance. He uses endurance to shape character. And through that character, He anchors us in hope. Our calling as Christian leaders is not to rush in with answers, but to remain present when suffering feels unresolved. We stand with people in the middle of the process, trusting that God is forming something deeper than comfort — He is forming hope. Hope is not the denial of suffering. It is the confidence that God is working through it.
As I left NCSA this year, I was not thinking about strategy or structure. I was thinking about people — and about the responsibility we carry to see them fully. Since suffering truly leads to hope, asking better questions is one of the simplest ways we reflect Christ to one another.
— Joe Davis '15, Director of Online and Graduate Enrollment